Hurrah!!

[SaraLou]

Hello to everyone!
This is my first post and I'm instantly gonna start pleading for advice! I apologise for my cheek but am so utterly pleased that I have found this website as I hope you' ll be able to help me with some long standing problems. I have a 26mth old daughter and a 8mth old son and have been a vegetarian for about 13 yrs. I have been attempting to eat a vegan diet for the last 3 years or so. However, I'm sure you'll appreciate that I didn't feel practised enough (nor did I have any support) to keep it up once I fell pregnant. I would love to raise my family as vegans although I realise the transition from a vegetarian diet will take a while. The problem that I have is that my health visitor and doctor both recomend that I give my children dairy produce even though they react badly to milk. When I first gave my daughter cows milk at about 8mths she developed eczema. I knew that the cows milk was responsible as it was the only new food she had been introduced to at the time. My family all put it down to my getting carried away with my opinions about dairy. Not knowing what to do and having my confidence in my own judgement somewhat marred I sought medical advise. I came away with an array of creams, ointments and lotions to use on the eczema after being told it was dangerous to mess about with infant's diets. Against my better judgement (why treat the symptoms with a bunch of unnecessary chemicals rather than identify and eliminate the cause??) I used said products on my daughter and it did keep the condition under control. As I still wasn't really happy I have reduced her dairy intake to the minimum. Her father loves cheese so it's hard to stop her having any.
Now for the second chapter. Thanks for bearing with me!
My son has recently been introduced to dairy and within 3 or 4 days I knew he was having the same reaction. Only his is even worse. Really sore and weepy skin where it was beautiful before. This time no one was going to tell me that the milk was not responsible but I have been given the same batch of chemicals given to my daughter.
I so wish that I had not given either of them any milk or at least left it until later on. I was advised to wait until 6mths but was scarred into believing that they must have milk at that time.
Now I just don't know what to do!!
My son has a big breast feed first thing in the morning and last thing at night and he feeds for over an hour both times. But as he has got used to not having a feed during the day I don't really want to reintroduce one, what's more, I'm not arround at least once a week to be able to give him some and can only get about an ounce if I try to express for ages.
Also he can't get the hang of sucking and I give him water on a spoon!
I'm so worried about his diet but have lost all faith in my doctor and health visitor. Ihope that one of you can help me out - if you've not all driffted off..........

[vegma]

Hello SaraLou,

I've been lurking on this board for a while and your post inspired me to register! I would encourage you to follow your own instincts with your children, although I know it is hard to do without support. I was an omni when my baby was diagnosed with a milk allergy at 6 weeks. He was exclusively breastfed, so the milk products I was ingesting were causing problems for him. I immediately discontinued all "known" dairy in my diet, and gradually eliminated the hidden ones as well. After I had been dairy-free for a little more than a year, I gave up meat and eggs as well, and have now been meat and egg free for two years. My three-year-old had some baked goods with egg early on, but has otherwise been vegan since birth (well, almost - I'm a stickler on almost everything but honey - ouch!). The point I'm trying to get to is that he is bright, healthy, and tops the charts on both height and weight! And we're lucky to have a ped that acknowledges that I know more about the nutritional advantages of our diet than she does! So follow your heart and good luck!!

[Erin Pavlina]

Hello SaraLou,

You might really benefit from reading my book, Raising Vegan Children in a Non-Vegan World
(www.vegfamily.com/raising-vegan-children (http://www.vegfamily.com/raising-vegan-children/index.php?src=forumpost)) because the book addresses a lot of the problems you're having.

That said, I know how hard it is to stand up for yourself when your family and health professionals are all against you. Is there a father in the picture and is he vegan too?

[SaraLou]

Thanks for the replies, they've cheered me up!!
My partner does not eat meat but it's due to his being a truely fussy eater rather than anything to do with ethics or health. He used to eat a ridiculous amount of dairy every day - he only eats one kind of sandwich and that's cheese with dry bread! He also eats eggs in cakes (unless I made them) and he adores yorkshire puddings which are the only thing I can't provide an egg-free version of. I get real grumpy with him for not being as supportive as I'd like him to be but in reality it has little to do with the vegan issue. He just hasn't got much of a clue about nutrition at all as it doesn't interest him. He's not a worrier like me you see and would probably just feed the kids cakes, crisps and biscuits. And cheese of course!! Having said that he must take in some of what I tell him as he has reduced his dairy intake over the last year or so. He'll only have one bowl of cereal now where he used to have 3 or 4 and I make him flapjacks for his lunch in place of the cheese sandwiches. He really is far too fussy to become a vegan though. As far as vegetables go he'll only eat frozen peas and raw carrot (which must be whole, never grated!)and regards pulses as if they're some evil toxin that'll kill him if he looks at them too long, let alone eat them!! I think it does depress me a little to know that we can't take the same path.
A further thing I forgot to mention first time round was that my youngest sister was allergic to cows milk and given soy formula as a tiny baby. Unfortunatly she was also allergic to the soy and was very ill for some time. I am addopted so there's not going to be any genetic link between her and my children but this knowledge has contributed to my worries and explains why I haven't just gone ahead and used a soy formula. I want to get his eczema under control before I use soya. Out of interest, would you have any idea what is given in the case of both dairy and soy intollerance?
Regarding my son, I am feeding him a vegan diet at the moment and breastfeeding at morning and night. As he's not having any formula at all during the day I'm adding extra fat to his vegetables in the form of olive oil and flaxseed oil. I'm still painstakingly feeding him water on a spoon too! Does this sound ok? He's of a good size and weight but as i said before I really am a worrier!!!

[vegma]

I'm lucky that dh followed me down this road and is very supportive of feeding our son a vegan diet. It does make it easier! Ds is three and still nurses at least 3 times a day, so we haven't had to worry about formula. But I didn't introduce soy into his diet until after he was a year old for the same concerns you mentioned. If you're down to nursing twice a day at 8 months, you probably will need a supplement. If you're still considering breastfeeding, have you tried a good-quality electric pump? They're amazing!! I know you can rent them across here. And, silly as this sounds, have you tried giving the baby a drink from a cup?! I wish I could be of more help!

[Erin Pavlina]

SaraLou,

Your son is 8 months old right? Babies need breastmilk or formula until they are one year old. if you had to guess how many ounces of breastmilk per day he is getting, what would you estimate?

[SaraLou]

Hello again and thanks for your time!
I'm going to find out about electric pumps as soon as I can. I know they had them in the hospital.
I have offered my son a cup (tried again this morning) but he's not having any of it! He just pushes it away and starts blowing raspberries with the water if more than a spoonful goes into his mouth at a time!! I'm not worried about that though as I realise he'll soon sort it out. I have no worries about his development because he actually discovered how to squirt the water into his mouth by pressing his finger against the bottle teat! He's been doing so for a couple of months, which is quite ingenious, I think. It just makes things somewhat awkward. He gets fed up after a couple of squirts and I have to make up for it later with the trusty spoon to ensure a healthy fluid intake is maintained. I wouldn't be supprised if he doesn't just grab his sister's water one day and drink that. I know he's had his eye on it!
As far as his milk intake goes I'm finding it real hard to make any kind of estimation. All I know is that he does feed for around an hour each time and even though he may doze for a moment now and then. He must get more than a pint as the milk flows quite steadily as long as he's sucking for it. Since my last post I've started to worry about it a little less and am thinking more about making sure my diet is sufficient to provide him with good rich milk. I just need to let go of the fear I have of food allergy I think. I might investigate which formulas are available and try one this week. I do have concerns about soy intollerance but I now realise that I could carry on worrying about different foods forever. A couple of days ago we had an episode involving my 26mth daughter and some courgette. I never would have thought she would be allergic to such a food but was told that it's certainly not unheard of by the Allergy advise helpline here in the UK!! Actually, I'm now gonna have a quick look at the message board to see if anyone else has any experience of allergy/intollerance.

[sophie]

Hello Saralou
We gave my daughter soy milk when weaning from breastmilk (she was fully weaned at 18 months but started on soy at one year) and she turned out to be intolerant to this. Although she has never had cow's milk, tests showed she was also intolerant to this. I didn't want to give her rice milk at that age as a staple, as it is low in protein, so I gave her almond milk for quite a while. It was expensive to buy, so i made it as well. Now she is nearly 4 and she drinks fortified rice milk.
I definitely think you should stick to your guns and cut out the cow's milk. I believe that if a food has an obvious physical manifestation such as excema, this is just the tip of the iceberg, and there could be several other things going on as well. I know that my daughter was a very fussy baby, which could have been due to the soy in my diet, because when she had soy removed she was so much happier and healthier-looking.
All the best of luck!

[SaraLou]

Cheers Sophie!
I wish I knew what it was that my sister was fed on after being diagnosed with a milk and soy allergy. Unfortunatly my doctor and health vivitor wont even enter into a discussion on the topic. As my son is only intollerant to cow's milk and not fully allergic they won't recomend anything else. I've also become worried about a multitude of other food stuffs since researching food allergy/intollerance and have been advised not to give my children any nut or seed products until they are 5!! This kind of reduces my options! Has your daughter experienced any other adverse reactions? And where were the tests done. They are reluctant to do such tests here on young children. Preffering to slap on some cream. With a little extra for luck!! I'm sure food allergies/intollerances are difficult enough to deal with, without trying to fit them into a vegan or even vegetarian lifestyle!