Parenting Tips with Melanie Wilson

Melanie Wilson is vegan mom to Kalli MacKenzie. She is the owner and editor of Vegetarian Baby and Child Magazine (www.vegetarianbaby.com), a writer, educator, and researcher. She is currently working on her first book on vegetarian parenting. Her articles have been published on iParenting.com, MomsOnline.com, and will soon appear at VegDining.com. She is also an accredited La Leche League Leader.

Question:

I'm a vegan, but my boyfriend isn't. He is very supportive of me been a vegan. But I would love him to try as well. He almost lives on meat (yuk). I can cope because I don't live with him and he doesn't eat it in front of me. He says if he does try he would lose too much weight, which is probably true because he is not willing to try new foods. Is there any way of converting him, do you think our relationship will continue to work in the future, when I can't stand being near meat?

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Answer:

While there are no guarantees in life, especially when it comes to relationships, I can say that your vastly different eating preferences is an issue that will definitely be a problem in the future if you try to change him. It's clear that he isn't interested in veganism at this time, and sometimes the best we can do is simply teach by setting an example. On the other hand, he seems to be very supportive of you, which is wonderful! Just think how frustrated you'd be if he tried to change your diet. If you can accept him for who he is right now and remember that we are all on different paths in this journey of life, you can avoid some problems. Rest assured that there are lots of happy veg/non-veg couples out there. That's not to say that diet is never an issue, but the ones who make it are the couples that accept each other, talk openly and regularly about diet issues, and agree to support each other with family and friends. They come up with guidelines that they both agree upon concerning which foods will be allowed at home, who will do the cooking, whether or not to raise children vegetarian, etc. If you are seriously considering a long-term relationship with this man, I urge you to explore these issues with him and be honest with yourself about what you can and cannot live with.

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